perceptive projection

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways... so Elizabeth said/wrote down many a years ago.

I have heard that phrase since the olden days where my feet were still light, unburdened by aches. Before Omega, before Yuri, before Jh, before B, before RK, before everyone except Alpha. After all, Alpha was before everything. He is my book of genesis. 

Through my growing years, I heard that phrase written by Elizabeth Barret Browning quoted, paraphrased, recited through many things for many things. Most of them have something to do with love. And even I, in my puerile years perhaps, had copied the poem down and gave it to someone, surely. I am not so sure about it since I can be very private when it comes to verses, my own or my favourites written by other people. But surely for that poem, after all, I have my cheesy moments, not often thankfully, but they do strike even my aloof facade and manage to go through successfully.

Not often. But it happens. Usually when I feel deeply for a particular person.

I wrote tons of reasons why I love/d Alpha, in structured forms or scattered diaries containing personal orgasms meant for my eyes only forever and ever [my only excuse is I was young]. 

These days of course I am more in control, my self-control is without doubt ever in place, shiny and without dents. No more books and books wasted for the innoncence voice of gushing adulation. No more the sweet admiration of the person with whom I thought I couldn't live without. I am mature. I am restrained. I am all grown up.

When people ask me what I love about Omega most. I just say I love him. I don't mention his height. even so. I don't mention his sense of humour. even so. I don't mention his understanding. even so. I don't mention his making love techniques that drive me wild. even so. I don't mention the mere presence of him makes my heart skips a twitter. even so.

I have proven to myself that I am grown up. I have self-control. I am aloof. I am cool. 

I just say I love him. Most of the time.  

And write only on-line about Omega's eyes. The most beautiful eyes I have ever since, the colour of an ever changing green sea in some parts of the aegean sea. In them I see myself. I see his love. I see hope. I see promises. I see valueable gems that beheld the world to me.

"Let me count the ways..."

And it starts with Omega' eyes and from there it flows infinitely. 

And yes, I am grown up enough to let the world know.